Life is busy. Blessing is walking, starting to talk, and loves to follow me around the house. The big boys love to play within about a foot of each other (despite our best efforts), but they don't love playing with Blessing all the time. We have dubbed him, "Sammy the Destroyer" for good reason.
I don't like to think too much, as it makes me sad and melancholy. So I stay busy. Putting my thoughts down into words falls along the same lines as thinking, so I've found excuses to not post.
Today (technically, yesterday; it's 1:30 a.m.) was the 1st anniversary of my dad's death, and instead of thinking about him, or what I was doing this time last year, I did my best to stay busy all day. All week, really. I really need to go to bed. In a minute. I need to do this first.
I miss him so much. I never thought I would have so many times I wish I could ask his advice, hear his voice, see his face, visit him at Costco (where he worked), or see him interact with my kids. He always put huge smiles on their faces. I hope they don't forget him. We don't talk about him much, except to say he's in heaven with God and Jesus. I don't know if the twins even remember his face. I only have a small photo of him out.
My children are beautiful, happy, healthy (except for their nasty coughs right now), and so smart. They remind me of him, with his big ears and sneaky grin. They deserve more from me, but I'm barely keeping my head above water. I wish I could be a better mother for them. I need to sleep so I can at least be civil to them tomorrow. I'll leave you with a photo, and hope I can post again soon.
Today's encouraging verse: "But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives." 2 Peter 3:10-11
